


Bilbo Has An Affair With Thorin's Chest

by YellowTopaz



Series: Sneaky Little Burglar [2]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Accidental Marriage, Laketown, M/M, No seriously Thorin's Chest actually makes a major appearence, Sharing a Bed, Wiggling of eyebrows, boredom does things to you, i was bored, okay?, or something like that, what am I even writing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:26:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26862856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YellowTopaz/pseuds/YellowTopaz
Summary: Hey folks, so, this is a sort of continuation *cringes* of Sneaky Little Burglar *cringes again because oh my god, was that really the best name I could come up with?* so go read the first story as the beginning of this one won't really make sense if you don't. Its called…Wait for it…The Sneaky Little Burglar Steals Everything From Everyone*triple cringes*I'm sorry, I'm not creative okay? Anyway, go read that. Like, now. Yes, now. *shoos you along with hand**whispers* -this sounds like a bad Geico ad-EDIT: I just realized that I never actually put a summary on here. *facepalm* But I suppose if your ead the title, you'll know all you need to know.
Relationships: Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield
Series: Sneaky Little Burglar [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1959688
Kudos: 38





	Bilbo Has An Affair With Thorin's Chest

**Author's Note:**

> halp. I'm not sure what this is supposed to be. An epilogue maybe? I dunno.

_**Laketown, 3 AM, right after the celebratory feast, in a very dark room that Bilbo and Thorin took the liberty to have some fun *wiggles eyebrows* in.** _

"BILBO!"

Bilbo bolted upright from his place on the bed. "AAAAAH! WHAT?! WHAT IS IT?! THORIN? THORIN!"

"MY HAIR BEAD IS MISSING!"

Bilbo became even more alert before Thorin's words registered in his brain. Groaning, Bilbo lied back down on the bed and rolled over, his forearm covering his eyes, and the blanket pulled up to his nose. "Is that it?"

"OF COURSE THAT'S IT! IT'S MY DAMN HAIR BEAD, BILBO!"

Bilbo moaned and rolled over again, this time to bury his face in Thorin's chest. Thorin's chest was always warm. "If I knew you were going to make such a fuss about it, I would have given it back to you ages ago."

Thorin stiffened and made to lift his torso from the bed. This would have caused Bilbo to lose his furnace, so he pinched Thorin's nipple and forced him back down again, burrowing into his chest even further with a small smile on his face. Bilbo could have stayed in that moment forever, comfortable, warm, Thorin's chest within reach…

"Bilbo, I–"

"Stop talking."

"You understand what–"

"Stop talking."

"Bilbo, you just–"

"Damn it, Thorin, do you not understand what those two words mean?"

Thorin shut up for a good minute before talking over Bilbo's protests.

"You just proposed to me."

That stunned Bilbo into silence. He opened and closed his mouth for a bit, looking a bit like the fish in those barrels (it was not a time Thorin liked to remember). Then he rubbed his cheek against Thorin's chest (really, Thorin was wondering if he should be jealous of his chest) and spoke.

"So is it a yes or no?"

They had an extended engagement period until it was fall again, a few days before Bilbo's birthday, for Bilbo had always wanted to get married during autumn. And every year, on their anniversary, the two take the day off and keep to each other. They spend every year in bed, with Thorin's arms around Bilbo, and Bilbo's face buried in Thorin's chest.

(Bilbo had actually been cheating on him with Thorin's chest. Thorin wasn't sure if he was supposed to be amused or heartbroken when he found out.)

**Author's Note:**

> I regret…
> 
> everything.


End file.
